I'm Scared
by its an ADDICTION
Summary: I'm scared," I admitted. He sighed, "That's the way it's supposed to be." "I love you, Edward," I whispered. He said, "As I do you, my wife." - Bella is scared about life after becoming a vampire. Will Edward be able to calm her? R&R, please.
1. Prologue: I'm Scared

**songs for this chapter:** _Edward At Her Bed,_ by Carter Burwell

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**BPOV**

I ran my fingers over his jawline. Still cold to the touch, like it was every night.

I sighed. I didn't know what would happen once I changed. That is... if he'd do it. I know I had no right to doubt him, but I was scared. Nervous. Excited. Anxious. I was like a hormonal pregnant woman without the fetus gnawing at my insides.

He looked back at me, staring into my eyes as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear. "What are you thinking?" he whispered.

"About you. Me. Us. What will happen once you... you know," I trailed off, not sure as to what I should say.

He kissed me softly, as if I could break if any wrong move was made. His lips felt like ice against my warm human ones. Of course. It would be like that until 'it' happened.

His lips then left my mouth, tracing along my jaw, then to my ear. He kissed my earlobe and muttered, "You have nothing to be afraid of, love. I'm here. I always will be. Remember that."

I shivered. I'll never get used to the way his voice always sounded like chocolate velvet, or the way his cool breath tickled every nerve inside my body.

"I'm scared," I admitted.

He sighed, cradling me against his marble chest in his arms. "That's the way it's supposed to be."

I nodded, hiding my face into his shirt. "I love you, Edward," I whispered.

I could hear the smile in his voice as he said, "As I do you, my wife."

He then hummed me to sleep, still holding me against his chest.

If only we could stay this way forever.

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**so, this is my first attempt at a Vampire Edward/Human Bella story. that was the prologue. i'd really like to hear your thoughts on it :D please review!**


	2. We Belong Together

**songs for this chapter:** _Phascination Phase__,_ by Carter Burwell - _I Dreamt Of Edward,_ by Carter Burwell - _The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb, _by Carter Burwell - _Edward At Her Bed, _by Carter Burwell - _Bella's Lullaby,_ by Carter Burwell

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**BPOV**

I tossed and turned that night, still caught up with the thoughts of changing. I wanted to change, of that I was absolutely determined and sure. But I couldn't help but wonder... what if Edward didn't like what I was going to be like afterwards?

Would I still be the same, timid Bella? Would I still lust after him like I did? Would things change between us?

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand to the right of me. 3 o'clock in the morning. I sighed internally, wishing I could fall back asleep, wishing Edward wasn't watching my every move at that moment. It got annoying sometimes.

I lie there, still, in the dark. All I heard was my breathing and Edward's humming. My heartbeat, his inhaling. I wondered if he was smelling me.

I still wondered every moment why he did that. _'Why do you do that to yourself?'_ I wanted to ask him. _'Why cause yourself such pain and hurt as you do when you smell my blood? Why?'_

But I couldn't. It wouldn't be worth it, anyway. He'd just say something like, _'Because I can.'_

Of course he can. He could do whatever he wanted, and I'd be fine with it. Though, leaving wouldn't really leave me happy...

I can't believe I was thinking of that again. That was almost a year ago. I should've forgotten about it by now.

Groaning, I kicked the blanket off of me, turning to my right. Edward, of course, noticed my tension and slid closer to me.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me tightly to his chest. "Something bothering you?" he murmured.

"No," I lied. Of course something was bothering me. He knew that. But it wasn't his fault that I was stressed. It was mine. I had to be the stupid one, I had to go and ask, pretty much beg him to change me.

"Bella," he whispered, running his nose alone my neck.

I let out a strangled sob. Oh, great. _Now_ I'm actually acting like a hormonal pregnant woman.

"I'm just so scared," I croaked. "What if you don't love me the same anymore? What if I'll be different? What if all the venom does is kill me?"

He shushed me, whispering sweet nothings in my ear as he cradled me against him. "It'll be alright, love," he murmured. "I'll always love you. Even if you were bald, had one eye, three legs and a lobster tail, I'd still love you. I wouldn't take you out in public, but I'd love you."

I laughed, wiping away the tears that I didn't know I had shed. I tried to believe him. Really, I did. But I couldn't help but just wonder... what if he was only _saying_ that, and not meaning it?

"How do you know?" I asked. "How do you know that you'd hate what you so, no matter the circumstance? That the tiniest little difference would change everything you thought about me forever?"

"Bella, come on, you know-" I cut him off, wanting to let him know how I felt.

"I'm serious, Edward. What if it's all just a poker face you're putting on? What if you feel just as scared as I do? We both know how you are with showing your feelings. And I, for one, am not just going to sit here blubbering like an idiot while you're pushing away how you really feel."

I heard him sigh, and his tone was a bit softer. "Fine, you want to know how I really feel? I'm scared, just like you are. Not as scared, really, but the feeling is there. But why focus on how scared we are when we could be enjoying the last few moments of your human life? I'd rather do that than be afraid, if you ask me," he muttered.

I knew he was right. He knew he was right. He was always right. I shouldn't be focusing on the negative. Because if I do, then that'll cause some problems. Maybe even a fight.

Edward ran his fingers gently through my hair, knowing that would always calm me down.

"Don't be afraid," he murmured. "We belong together."

"Forever."

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**heh, i hope you liked my little Breaking Dawn slip in there. : ) please tell me what you think of it, and what you'd like to see. though there probably won't be any Jacob in this story at all.**


	3. Long Day: Edward's POV

**songs for this chapter: ****_ The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb, by Carter Burwell_**

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**EPOV**

I was worried about her. I understand that she'd be nervous, but not like this. Not to the point where it consumes her every action and thought.

She tossed and turned last night. Just like she did every night. It was unbearable to just watch her and not be able to do anything about it, not be able to reach inside her head and see what she was thinking.

Though she told me, of course. And snapped at me. But I didn't mind one bit. If it made her feel better, then that's all that matters.

That was around 3 in the morning. So it must be 7 by now.

I turned to look at her. She was finally sound asleep after hours of crying and admitting her fear. I quietly slipped out of the bed, deciding to let her rest for the remainder of the day.

Walking over to her, I noticed such dark circles under her eyes. I frowned. I didn't like seeing her like this... so fragile and afraid. Of course, she was supposed to be afraid. But that didn't mean she nor I had to like it.

I placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, whispering to her that I loved her. She smiled in her sleep which made me smile.

I walked out of the room, closing the door. _She needs sleep, _I thought to myself. _And help._

I sighed. This was going to be a long day.

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**there you go, those are Edward's thoughts of Bella's situation. tell me if you want more Edward POV's once in a while or if you also want any other Cullen family member POV. please review. reviews make me post quicker :D**


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